Connected
by diamondpearl876
Summary: At first, Risa doesn't understand Satoshi at all, and she refuses to let it go on forever. .satoshixrisa.


Written for 30_ballads. Prompt: Sanctuary.

I own nothing.

Connected

_i. after all the tears we've cried, we're not supposed to be here;_

At first, Risa doesn't understand Satoshi at all.

He's always, always moving, always has to be doing something. He always has to be tapping his foot, or messing with an object nearby if possible, and when she confronts him about it, he simply says that he's just bored, really. He always shifts around in his seat, and when she questions him about it, he clearly says that the seat isn't very comfortable for him, really.

And she never believes him.

Risa can tell that he's lying with his tense, melancholic eyes that are always focused on what he's doing, and it seems that if he does anything else, something terrible will happen and his entire world will be destroyed. She can tell that he's lying when he winces at the slightest of touches, and still, he avoids coming in contact with anything else and keeps moving, because he wants to, because he needs to.

She refuses to let the misunderstanding go on forever.  
_  
ii. break through the surface, and see who i am;_

"Why do you keep flipping through the pages like that?" Risa inquires, pushing his hand away from the textbook and brings his attention to the paper that she needs to complete.

"I'm looking for the answer," Satoshi says bluntly, reaching for the smooth, inviting pages once again.

"You've already been through college, though! And you said this was easy! You shouldn't have to," Risa complains.

"I guess you're right," Satoshi says, and Risa stares at him in confusion. She's surprised to hear something like this from him after all of the excuses she has been given for what seems like forever.

"Oh. I am? Well, then, why are you doing it?" she says carefully, slowly, afraid of pushing him over the edge somehow or sending him back into the withdrawn state that she's trying so hard to cure.

"Because it reminds me that I'm in control of my life, and no one else," he replies quietly as he goes from page to page, never seeing anything at all.

Risa smiles slightly and allows Satoshi to continue what he's doing, as she doesn't feel that she has the right to interrupt him anymore. It's the first time he's opened up to her, even just a little bit, and so, she says nothing more, and accepts it all whole-heartedly.

_iii. let's show them that we can free our minds and find a way to move forward;_

To Risa, art is just... art.

She's never cared for any of it very much. It's just a bunch of colors and simple pictures with no deep meaning behind them placed upon walls in her mind. Despite this, she doesn't say no when Satoshi asks her to visit an art museum with him, and is amazed when she sees his reaction to every single piece of work they pass by.

He reaches out with his fingers as close as he can and moves them as if both his fingers and the painting are fragile and will shatter into a million pieces if he defies the fate they have been given. He stares and never makes any comments to her about any of them, and she wonders what he's thinking, what exactly he's absorbing with that determined face and those intense eyes of his.

"They aren't alive, but at the same time, they are alive," he says when they're near the end.

"I... I'm sorry. I don't understand what you mean," she says, looking down to the ground, ashamed to admit it to the boy. She tries to understand his words, but doesn't come up with anything plausible.

"They aren't causing destruction everywhere they go, and instead place joy into the hearts of everyone. It's... nice for me to witness and realize this and it means a lot to me that we could come here, because I refuse to give in to my family's destiny and run away. I want to stay right here," he explains vaguely. He puts his arm around her shoulder and squeezes it reassuringly, and they leave the museum-- probably not for the last time, Risa thinks, because she knows that a return to the museum would continue to help for everything to fall into place for her and Satoshi.  
_  
iv. and suddenly isn't quite what it used to be;_

They're supposed to be watching a movie.

Risa is well aware that Satoshi isn't one to ignore a film and find something else to do, then tell others that he's seen the movie when he really hasn't. And so, she keeps her head rested against his chest, feeling it rise and fall, over and over again, and tries to pay attention to anything that she thinks will catch his eye and bring her one step closer to her goal of putting together the puzzle pieces that he's composed of.

But, she finds it hard to concentrate on anything as his fingers run through her dark hair and as they touch her face ever so lightly, as if he doesn't want to her to notice.

"Um... Satoshi, is something... wrong?" she says patiently, lifting up her head to look at him.

"I'm sorry, Risa," he replies, his expression as emotionless as ever.

"No, no, it's fine, really! I was just wondering--"

"Is this any better?" Satoshi interrupts, placing his hand on top of hers, and keeps it there with no tapping of the fingers or any other kind of movement, and with no intentions of removing it any time soon.

"Oh... Well," she says, feeling her face burn and turn red from embarrassment, "I didn't mean to stop you, because I know just sitting here is never really enough, that you have to be moving and--"

"It's fine," he says suddenly, grinning. "If I have you, I have the entire world in my hands, and the world is always moving, always turning, and it will never stop."

And Risa finally thinks she understands.


End file.
